Chapter 23: Setting The Bar

Dear readers,

I imagine that with dreams comes work, with work comes ideas and with ideas comes a plan because in order to achieve what you desire, you need a starting point, a hub to make sure you have something or somewhere to refer to in the times where you feel directionless, lost amongst the fog, hoping and praying you will find the way out. A brainstorming session or two produces the ideas, the raw components that will be engineered into a more concrete and complete nature that will end up being the fuel you need to get stuck into the work ahead. It can be tiring, it can be hard, it can be a painfully, arduous experience but a level head, whether on old shoulders or young will lead you to the promised land where you dreams come to life and you gaining a massive sense of well-being. But what if you’re that kind of person who always has to be the best no matter what the costs. I don’t know what humble pie looks like or how it tastes but without realising it, I’ve tasted humble pie many times so there’s always that feeling whilst sat down, I can say “I’m doing pretty alright at the moment” when I’m in a good mood but that’s not the case for everyone. If complacency is a poison for all the wrong reasons, success is a poison for all the right reasons only it being a poison means it can be a bad thing if there’s too much of it.

Setting the bar high, again and again can have its gains but with it comes the risks that flank the gains on either side. One goal might be attainable and relatively simple to reach but in doing so may bring about the bar being set so high, you have to go into orbit in order to reach it and without that satisfaction, you become miserable, ignorant to the good things that surround you because you’re mind is fixating on jumping over the bar like it’s a high jump competition, failing again and again but rather than setting a more achievable goal, you refuse to accept defeat and in a wicked twist of fate, the bar is beating you rather than it being the other way round. I’m not saying that you should be unambitious and play it safe all the time. Sometimes though, he who dares wins. If you don’t buy a ticket, you can’t win the lottery, some risks either brazenly rash on the brink of suicide or ones calculated and analysed with the utmost care bring about those dreams in the promised land but take too many chances and you might suffer a heavy fall, plummeting you back to square one with the urge the tear your hair out running havoc inside your minds. Setting too many targets is also risky because you’ll become prone to feeling incomplete, like an unfinished jigsaw puzzle with the missing pieces almost impossible to find.

I speak theoretically because I know that there isn’t a set pattern of events that will happen when you strive to the top. You might set your bar but come to the conclusion that if everything that could have gone wrong, it’s gone wrong despite you following every rule in the book in trying to inject some purpose into your existence on Earth. You planned, you invested your efforts, you didn’t do anything silly despite making a few risks and mistakes but with no end product, a demoralising spiral into depression awaits unless you brush yourself down, get up and fight again and when you do get up, you fight with twice the punch so you avoid another eight count. What I’m really saying is setting the bar high despite all the failings in the past is a must to avoid the poison that only brings about the negatives. Don’t allow the thick mud of complacency to cause you to sink into the quicksand of merely existing, find that second wind and maybe a new purpose to wiggle, shake, crawl, do whatever to get out of the quicksand and start living again. The irony of you being killed by the very thing you are trying to bring to life can be cruel at first but stick to it and the rewards of your labour will blossom, leaving you thankful for the self-belief you had when times were tough.

By setting manageable yet challenging tasks for you to accomplish, you will be able to control the cravings of success because when you find that right kind of success, other successes may become meaningless. Willpower, hunger and determination go together like the ingredients for a cake, will you be able to provide the icing on the cake and the cherry on top to complete the job and enjoy the scrumptious satisfaction of a job well done?

‘Dr. R’

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Author: Dwayne Bickersteth

I like to write. I like to take pictures. That is all.

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