The unbearably hot nights where you sleep without the warmth of your duvets, warmth that only makes the night harder to cope with whilst trying to keep cool. The days where outside burns like a frying pan on top of a cooker, the blue heat that burns underneath the pan replicated by the mighty Sun, cooking all that dwell beneath it like the eggs frying away for breakfast. The humid weather conditions, making each step feel like you’re walking through treacle, your body sweating it out while the mercury rises in a climate that closely resembles a sauna, in fact if you look around at the number of people not wearing much at all, you might as well be in a sauna it’s so hot.
Summer means two things, one, losing your shit in the blistering heat, desperately trying to get that old fan in the cupboard to work and two, going on holiday and for me, that time has come. I’m going to be away for while but not for too long, it’s not as if I’m going A.W.O.L. For my first destination, I’m off to Paris.
The Eiffel Tower, The Arc De Triomphe, The River Seine, The Notre-Dame and of course, Disneyland Paris, all places and monuments that give the French capital its identity. I wonder what I’ll eat while I’m there, I’m not sure when there’s the croissants to the baguettes to salty frog’s legs and slimy snails. What should I wear, maybe a red beret, too cliché, perhaps a stripey blue and white top, no that’s cliché as well, should I grow a moustache to try and fit into the culture? Please! All I need to do is learn how to become a mime artist, find another one whilst I’m in the city, challenge him to a duel before punching him in the balls to win the battle before continuing my journey to find Mike……wait a minute, who the hell is Mike? I don’t know a Mike! What next, a trip to the beach where everyone is in their birthday suits and when I mean everyone, I mean every man with no sight of a woman anyway nearby!
Well then……I guess this story went from 0 to 100 real quick. Not really sure where to go from here except do this……
Now where was I, oh yes, I remember know, I’m going on holiday. After I take in the sights and wonders of Paris, I come back home for a few days before leaving for a second time, this time heading north of the border to Scotland, more precisely, Glasgow.
I’ll be here for a few days, visiting family as well as enjoying one of the world’s most friendly cities. Even though I hate the cold weather, I love it when I come to Glasgow, it’s a place I always feel an element of regret whenever it’s time to leave. Glasgow is like London in the sense that you have older buildings sometimes standing side by side with buildings from this generation, two eras standing together, a mixture of the past and the present. Luckily, this being the summertime, I won’t have to take a scarf or a jumper with me, well I hope so, I mean it’s Scotland, they’re used to the cold and the snow but I don’t think Mother Nature would permit snow to fall in August, that would be nuts!
Anyway, I thought I’d let you all know I’ll be away. Don’t worry though, I’ll be back, you don’t need Arnie to tell you that.